You Traitor !

 You know…

Mother’s holed up in her room,
surrounded by your pictures.
She weeps—
disconsolately.
Endlessly.

And me?

All I want to know is why.
Why didn’t you call?
Why didn’t you ask for help?
Why didn’t you just… reach out a finger?
Just one.
I would’ve come.
God damn it, I would’ve come.
Even if you were in hell,
I would’ve dragged you out.

You were my umbrella—
the only place I found solace,
a place Father never could give.
You were that for me.
You were everything.

But now…
what do I do?

I’m eighteen.
But I’m no adult.
Not enough to carry this.
Not enough to walk this world alone.

This society—this life—
How am I supposed to tread it
without a light to guide me?

What were you trying to teach me, huh?
To jump from buildings the moment life hurts too much?
Because I swear to you—
I feel it.
I feel it too.

How could you, my dear brother—
my shade, my sun and moon—
how could you leave me behind
with nothing more then a laconic little letter?

Fuck you.
You weak-hearted coward.
I will verily hate you for the rest of my life.

You didn’t even think of us.
Not once.
You selfish… dear, broken, selfish brother.

Why did you lie every time I called?

You said—
“I’ll take care of myself.”
Then why didn’t you?

You broke everything.
The promises.
The ties.
The future.

You shattered it all into pieces.

We promised—
We promised we'd take care of each other.
So why did you leave?
Couldn’t you find the courage
to just… just live one more day?

You traitor.
You… god damn traitor.

Why did you leave?

Why?

Why?

I’d trade the world for one more day.
A.V